How failure can be a beautiful thing

When you think you should know better, but don't

Sometimes you just need a kick in the butt from your best friend. Not literally of course, but sometimes it takes a trusted person from your inner circle to help you see more clearly.

The other day my best friend of 30-something years said something to me that really got me thinking. I can’t help but admire her loving honesty.

She told me I inspire her. I do what? 

I have changed jobs -- and houses-- so many times I can’t even remember them all, tried to start multiple blogs and online magazines, cried buckets of tears on her back porch, make very little money and always find a way to screw up plans. How is that inspiring?

But, she says, “You never give up and you are always trying new things. You might think that’s scatterbrained, but I think that’s brave.”

Wow! I had never really thought of myself as being brave for repeatedly failing, but what a beautiful way to see them. It reminded me of how often I don’t take my own advice. ( I think we are all a little guilty of that).

 I always tell my nine-year-old daughter how special her own failures are. When she misspelled a word on her spelling test, I reminded her how that mistake will teach her how to spell it correctly now. When she forgot a dance move at her recital, I told her that experience taught her how to keep moving forward when it happens again. And when she spilled her blueberry smoothie all over the kitchen floor and cupboards, I reminded her how her mishap taught her something new – how not to use the blender without a lid.

So why is it when it’s my own failures, I fail to see the lesson? Perhaps it’s because I am a grown up and there is an expectation that I should know better. But should I?

No! I may not be a newbie at life experience, but there are certain things in life no matter how old we get, we just don’t need to know. We may think our lives would be better, less messy or stressful if we knew everything, but it would erode our child within – the one that keeps us curious, keeps us fun and keeps our imaginations churning. In a way, not knowing keeps our life interesting by giving us opportunities to fail and learn new things.

Don't stress if you don't know what your children will be when they grow up or what you will even be doing 10 years from now. We don't need to know how we will find time to clean the house this weekend... we just do, or we don't.

Taking a leap of faith that could result in failure takes courage and to fail and try again takes even more courage. Be brave, and go mess up!